How I handle Working Mom Guilt
The guilt working moms experience is crazy. My girls are fully aware Mama works. One of my twin’s favorite games right now is putting a purse on her arm, blowing me kisses goodbye and taking a lap around the house because she is “going to work.” Esther used to do the same thing. She would gather up tons of bags (because I was the bag lady with a purse, lunch bag and pump bag), then blow kisses as if she was going to work too! When I see Miriam do this I say, “You’re going to work? Okay! Have a great day, I love you!” and we’re basically opposite role-playing what happens every morning. In the morning Esther tells me she wants me to stay home and not go to work, but then she will also tell me she wants our nanny to stay with her forever. We will never be able to win.
I feel strongly about being a working mom because I would not be happy as a stay at home mom. I just know this about myself. I know plenty of moms who wish they could stay home with their kids, and many moms who wish they could work. I’m lucky because my reality and my desired reality line up. Additionally, one of the good things about working is my daughters see me as something more than just their mom. Esther has told me she works in a hospital too, but it’s farther away than my hospital. The name of her hospital is “Babies.” She knows I help people “like a doctor” (not quite what I do, but I’ll take it), and she often asks if we’re going to my work when we get into the car. My kids want to be just like me (what a power trip)!
Also, isn’t it weird how kids focus on moms working, but they don’t really hone in on daddy going to work? I wonder what that’s about… but that’s a blog post for another day. In the meantime, let’s remove the guilt and just enjoy any time we spend with our kids.