Mommy Confessions

The email I sent to my mom friends said:

“I would like to publish a blog post of mommy confessions (100% anonymous).  These are the things you would rather not share with…oh say your kids’ teacher or doctor, but something you just have to get off your chest….if you have something you want to confess, please email me back. I promise no one will ever know it was you.”

Mommy Confessions

Buckles are optional

I totally forgot to buckle both children in when we drove for almost an hour.

I didn’t realize we forgot to buckle our baby into her car seat until we got home and I got her infant carrier out of the car!

My 5 year old has yelled “I’m not buckled!” more than a few times when I’m in the front seat and ready to start the car.

We once drove 15 minutes before realizing our infant son was completely unbuckled in his car seat. I placed our son in his carrier in the house, then my husband put him in the car. We both assumed the other person had buckled him into the seat.  Shortly into the drive, our son started crying loudly. We pulled over in a parking lot; I got out to check on him in the backseat, and was horrified to find him sliding down, his legs hanging over the edge of the car seat. Thankfully he was fine and we learned a valuable lesson to always double check the buckles!

Knife to meet you! (oh, bad pun)

We have left really sharp knives on the edge of counters and I had some super close calls.

My kids have pushed chairs up to the kitchen island and picked up super sharp knives left on the cutting board yelling, “Here Mama!” They know they are not allowed to use them, so they were “being helpful” by handing them to me.

I recently learned my toddler is able to reach the counter in the kitchen… how do I know this? I walked in to find her just casually holding a giant kitchen knife! It couldn’t have been something like a sponge that was the first grab, she had to go big!

My toddler got a hold of my razor and I didn’t know until there was blood, a lot of blood.

Kitchen escapades

I don’t even try to stop my 1-year-old from crawling under the table to eat crumbs when a meal is over. I figure it’s less cleaning for me to do later.

 I’m OK with my kids eating food dropped onto the floor… in public too.

My son was about 9 months old when I decided to do a quick diaper change on the kitchen table (with a changing pad). I had the diaper in hand and needed to take a couple steps away in order to press the foot pedal on the nearby trash can. I KNEW I shouldn’t step away from the table, even for a second, but I did. My son rolled off the table, but he miraculously landed flat on his back, a few feet away from the table, right on a semi-cushy doormat.

My 18 month old was sitting at the table, strapped into his booster seat, while my husband and I finished grabbing cleaned up after dinner. There was a candle burning in the center of the table, clearly out of his reach. He was holding his bib, watching us gather everything. A moment later, I turned toward the table with the last item, and saw he’d tossed his bib onto the open flame! The plastic-coated bib went up in flames immediately, but luckily only at a small point in the middle that was touching the flame. I was able to grab the bib by the outer edge, get it to the kitchen sink and turn on the water before any more disaster occurred. We’ve never again had a candle on the kitchen table.

It’s 5 ‘o clock somewhere in the world

I drink wine because of my kids. Husband is a close third.

I am excited about planning a play date with a friend and our combined 5 kids because I’m packing snacks for the kids and wine for us.

I go to homes with older kids and just hope my kids will like them so they can watch each other and I can drink wine.

Everything else

When my daughter was 4 months I was so tired I literally fell asleep on her. Zzzzzzz.

My toddler licks the car and says “I love you,” and I don’t stop her.

I whisper “You’re my favorite” in my kid’s ear when no one is listening. I have 2 kids.

I brought my wide-awake 6 month old into the house in her infant car seat carrier. She was so quiet and content; I left her in the front hallway in her car seat for 30 minutes before I remembered she was there. She was wide-awake and just staring at everything.

My baby was 9 months old when I locked myself out of the house, and she was locked inside of the house!  She was safe in her crib upstairs and back in my arms in less than 2 hours, but the Russian locksmith had no idea why I was acting crazy about getting into the house ASAP.

I’ve been handed poop more often than I would like to admit.

Sometimes on my day to wake up early I give them sugary cereal, put on a movie and fall back asleep.

I do not always force my daughter to wash her hands before eating. I’d rather fight the battle of getting her to sit nicely at the table than wash her hands.

Husband and I occasionally lie to our daughter about bedtime. We put her to bed early so we can enjoy a “stay-at-home” date night.

I like my kids best when they are sleeping.

We bathe our kids about once a week. My little ones are still in diapers so they only wash their hands in the tub (to my knowledge).  Their hands are basically dirty for a week at a time.

I am pretty sure there are days my kids eat more cookies, cakes, candy and treats than real food.

My 2 year old smashed her middle finger in a door at day care. I saw the injury at pick-up; it didn’t seem terrible. We were running late to our music class, so we put a Band-Aid on it and she had fun in class. At the end of the class, her finger had soaked through the Band-Aid.  We replaced the bandage and went out to dinner.  Shortly after ordering our food, I saw she soaked through another Band-Aid.  I knew we were headed for medical care, but we had just placed our orders, so we ate dinner first.  Then we went to Urgent Care, but they redirected us to the ER.  When we arrived to the ER, I learned my daughter broke her finger!  The doctors removed her fingernail; she needed 2 stitches, and a splint to keep her finger immobile. I felt AWFUL.

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