Miss Manners will probably raise her eyebrows at me right now, but being a mom means I suddenly don’t care about getting peed or pooped on. Are you with me here? I have honestly convinced myself a little baby pee is like water, no big deal. If the girls pee in the bathtub, we keep tubbing and just use more soap and really crack down on NOT drinking the bath water. (I think Ilana’s mission is to drink her way out of the tub by scooping up bathwater and drinking it THE. WHOLE. TIME. she’s in there.) I will draw the line at poop – if there’s a turd in the tub, we evacuate and start over (at least that’s how I feel right now).
As a parent of young kids, so much of your life, therefore adult conversation, revolves around who pooped, who has yet to poop, the consistency of the poop, and where they pooped (if clothes need to be changed or carpet needs to be scrubbed). Did I think this would be my life? Uhhhh, no.
Let’s add another layer. If you are a breastfeeding mom, your boobs become completely nonsexual and how your nipples look/feel, how your breasts feel (full,empty, tight, painful, blocked ducts, etc.) is an easy conversation starter for any other new mom on the breastfeeding journey. I am a pretty modest lady, but if I’m nursing… I don’t care if my boobs are on public display at the Guggenheim if it means my babies are getting fed. (For the mamas of multiples, you CAN exclusively nurse twins!) My top priority is keeping my babies happy, covering up my boobs are not. NOW, I’m not nursing, so no one will be seeing any nipple or side-boob unless it’s completely by accident.
When you are in the “keep them alive and fed” mode of parenthood, you don’t blink twice before talking about your child’s bathroom habits, their feeding habits, and pretty much anything else because I think we all want to know is if we’re doing this right. Is someone else experiencing the same thing? Is this “normal” and OK?
Potty training amplifies this because you have one foot in the world of diapers and another in the world of toilets and you need to think about how your kid is going to handle/react to EVERY toilet/potty they encounter and pray it’s a successful experience because holy-moly you want to be done with diapers already! You see the light at the end of the tunnel and try to charge ahead.
I feel like I’m rambling, but I guess the point of this post is to say we’re all in the same yucky, stained, poopy-smelling boat when it comes to young parenthood. Putting on airs is not something I consider a part of my MO, and I know this probably makes a lot of perfectionists furrow their brows at me. But I’m not perfect and my kids certainly have their moments (like the time I could swear Miriam was getting exorcised outside of a restaurant while her sisters angelically watched and I stood next to them all on the sidewalk as my husband told the server we need to get everything we just ordered TO GO). <<sigh>>
It’s all worth it though… especially at the end of the day when you see their beautiful little faces sleeping and you could not imagine your life being even the slightest bit different.